Image by cobalt123 via Flickr
The Easter season is 50 days long so I don’t feel too bad writing this post so late.
I did not do a good job this Lent. The only Lenten resolution that I actually sorta stuck to was giving up sweets Mondays through Thursdays. Lame, I know. During my pregnancy I really indulged in sweets. Probably because I couldn’t drink. I got into a really bad habit of eating lots of cookies, candies, you name it. So for Lent I really wanted to start treating my body better and get back to a healthier me. I want to treat my body like the temple that God made it to be and not like a black hole for desserts.
Some of my other aspirations for Lent was to try to be less critical of Kraft and try to be a better, more patient mother. The Holy Spirit is really awesome. Me just aspiring to this was enough to let the Holy Spirit in and change me even though I myself wasn’t working too hard on changing. That is the amazing thing about Lent, even when I don’t really succeed at my end of the deal, God always holds up His end of the deal.
When Easter came I really felt that I had improved as a wife and a mother. O and I have really fallen into a good routine and I don’t feel her to be as burdensome as I used to feel. Of course I love my baby and don’t see her as a burden but on really hard days, the weight was pretty heavy. Those hard days that used to be pretty prevalent are much fewer now. I feel like I have finally hit my stride in motherhood. I can navigate around with O much better. I know how to grocery shop with her, walk around Target, do laundry, go for walks, do work around the house. Cooking with her is still extremely difficult but all in all I feel an ease to life now that was not there before. Thank you dear sweet Jesus.
As far as being a better wife. Well, I guess the real test would be to ask Kraft if he thinks I’ve become more patient and understanding but as far as I’m concerned, I think I have. Instead of getting mad at Kraft for not doing certain things, I’ve just tried to figure things out on my own. Kraft’s schedule is pretty busy and different day to day, so instead of depending on him to help me, I’ve just sucked it up and tried to figure it out on my own with O in tow. I realized I can’t just wait for her to be asleep or for Kraft to be watching her so that I can do everything that I need to do. I need to learn how to go about my day and my work with her at my side. I needed to realize that life can’t just stop because I have to hold a baby all day. Life has to continue and I have to figure it out. It’s still not perfect but it’s better.
Without even noticing or working too hard at it, the Holy Spirit has made me better this Lenten season. Thankfully God is much more faithful to our deals than I am.